The mentee makes the first contact

After you are matched with a mentor, it is up to you to make the first contact. Using the mentor's preferred method of contact, explain that you have been matched to him/her as a mentee and introduce yourself.

Introductions

Introduce yourself by giving your name and graduate department. The initial contact should be informal--not a goal-setting one. Ask some questions that will lead your contact to tell something more about him/herself. This interaction should be light and friendly. It is a time to get to know each other, and to share biographies.

Create an easy give-and-take relationship

You might ask your mentor about how many times s/he feels comfortable communicating. You might also discuss whether it is best to communicate strictly by e-mail, or whether you should consider telephoning one another. If you decide that telephoning is the preferred method of communication, agree on some times that are best for both of you. You don't want to feel rushed. Then there is the issue of who will be paying the long distance charges, should there be any. One advantage of e-mail is that it doesn't incur direct charges for each contact. Discuss in detail what each person hopes to gain from the relationship.

Taboo subjects

If there are subjects (like salary or personal life) that are off limits, establish these at the beginning.

Information was modified from Caltech's original version.